Getting Lost in the Work

Before our mission, Pres. Ostler said he had a feeling our mission would be a different experience than we expected. Other than the first month, when we were sent to American Samoa to help with the tsunami relief effort, our mission has not involved anything particularly unexpected--until the past couple of weeks.

When we arrived at the Institute last October, we discovered there were very few students there. It was a quiet place without much activity. We learned there had been a note on the door advising that no more non-members of the Church were allowed at the Institute. Games (primarily ping pong and pool) were only allowed on Fridays, and there were very few students attending classes. We got permission to allow the games every day, encouraged students to invite all their friends, especially non-members, had more parties, and did everything we could to promote an open, welcoming environment. There were some growing pains and things were difficult. We gradually implemented some rules designed to encourage students, including our non-member friends, to come to class and be active participants in Institute. To play games, print, and use the computers, they had to register and come to classes. We wondered for a long time if we were making a mistake, and enforcing our rules was not fun. As this semester started, I was miserable; I wondered if we were doing any good at all and felt like we were, to some extent, just putting in our time. My attitude stunk and I needed help.

After some very searching prayer and some very real and painful struggle, we felt impressed to start a special class for non-members and to change our attitude about these young people who seemed to be at the Institute just to play games. We have put our arms around them and welcomed them in, literally and figuratively. It has been an overwhelming success and has energized us and the entire Institute. We never expected to do "missionary work" like this while on a CES mission.

We have had some amazing experiences in the past few weeks. We are teaching basic Gospel principles and essentially giving the missionary discussions in our non-member class. This past Thursday, we had 13 non-members come to class. We have had two baptisms (Nora and Togipau; pictures below) at the Institute this semester; we also now have six more who are taking the missionary discussions and several more who are almost ready to meet with the young proselyting missionaries. Several are receiving the missionary discussions from us but just don't know it. The Lord has blessed us in amazing ways recently. Non-members interested in the Church suddenly are coming our of the woodwork.

Nora's Baptism Day

Togipau's Baptism Day

Tender mercies are being felt every day. The other day, one of our non-member friends, a girl named Vanessa, came into our office and asked if she could go to church. I, of course, said yes and asked her if she would also like to meet with the proselyting missionaries and formally take the lessons. She agreed to do so. I then had the task of finding someone here at the Institute to befriend her. I checked the list and found only one student from her village, who, unfortunately, had not been coming to class. I went into my office and said a prayer that someone would be put in Vanessa's path who could help her through this process. A few minutes later, a student asked me, "Elder Tolman, weren't you looking for someone from Motootua?" She then said, "I think those three new boys over there are from Motootua." It turns out they are not students but were on their lunch break from work and decided to drop by the Institute (they had never been here before); they were all from Motootua and one is the ward mission leader. A few minutes later, the student who had not been coming to class showed up to apologize for missing Sister Tolman's class and asked for some makeup work. She just happens to have been called recently as a stake missionary. I have never had a prayer answered so quickly and directly. We took Vanessa to Church on Sunday; she loved it, started the discussions this week, says she already has a testimony, and is excited about every new experience she has with the Gospel and Christ's Church.

A couple of weeks ago, there was an unfamiliar young man named Aolele hanging around the Institute late in the day. I asked him what brought him to Institute, expecting him to say "the games." He said he felt the need to change his life and thought a good way to start would be to be around good kids. He joined our new member class and has been very serious about exploring the Church. Last week, he came in and asked me if I would sign his copy of the Book of Mormon we gave him the week before. He opened it to the back page for me to sign and I noticed he had written something on it. I asked if I could read it, and he consented. He had written in very poetic form essentially that sometimes one has to hit rock bottom before the need to change becomes clear and that the Book of Mormon would change his life. I was privileged to sign his Book of Mormon. He has not started the discussions yet for family reasons but he comes to two of our classes regularly, is reading the Book of Mormon, and says he will join the Church someday.

What an amazing experience a mission is. We will be grateful forever for the Lord's guidance in doing what He wants us to do. We don't always see the big picture as life is unfolding, but He is in control and knows exactly what He is doing. Our task, our privilege, is to patiently and cheerfully do what He guides us to do regardless of what that might be. We truly are blessed; losing ourselves in the work has enriched and energized us.

Our busy, wonderful and adventuersome break ...

Our first semester of Institute ended the last week of May. Shortly thereafter, Rachel, Matt and Owen came for a visit. Followed by our dear friends, Bob and Rosemary Taylor. Then Jessica, Devon and the three girlies finished out our visits. It was so wonderful to see everyone. Each visit brought new adventures and good times.

We continued to do our Perpetual Education Fund work in between activities (just in case you wonder if we really are on a mission--sometimes I wonder too!). We spent one day with Elder Hamula and President Wheelwright (BYU Hawaii) traveling the island, holding educational firesides. it was a unique experience to work with Elder Hamula to help motivate the young adults of Samoa to seek higher education. We have seen up close and personal what an amazing disciple Elder Hamula is; how we have come to love him.

The very last week of our break, President Haleck asked us to accompany a young Elder to New Zealand for surgery. He doesn't speak much English so Reed interpreted for him. We also spent time with our wonderful friends, Pat and Paul Streiff. They spent one year of their mission in Samoa and then were sent back to the Area Office in New Zealand. We traveled for a couple of days seeing the country; what an amazing place. When it was all said and done, we were pretty homesick! We are back to teaching and loving seeing the students again.


Rachel and Matt's visit was fun and very busy; that seems to be the way things roll when Owen is around. We loved playing with him and listening to his stories. Unfortunately, while he was here he split open his head. After some lavender oil, a priesthood blessing and a makeshift bandage, he was good to go. It healed nicely and quickly; what a blessing! I think Owen's favorite thing was the ocean. He loved the water, the sand and the fish!





Bob and Rosemary are always so fun to have because they want to know everything about anything. We spent days traveling the island and talking, talking and talking--with a bit of Pinochle thrown in; well, more than a bit! It is their favorite game and we are happy to join them. I must report that the girls 'took Samoa!' Game on boys--next year! We also went to high tea (I know that is not how the English spell it--sorry) and on a hike up to Robert Louis Stevenson's grave site.




Jessica and Devon and girlies visit was so much fun. We wore Devon out the first week trying to see everything before he had to go home. We had some fun and a scare at the beach. (Ask Devon for the story) We also fed the turtles; they were hungry that day and just about snapped off some precious fingers.

Jessica and the girls stayed another week, which was so fun. We played hours of games with the girls, did some 'craps' (aka crafts--Jenna's leftover baby word) with sea shells and went to high tea. Jessica was brave enough to make the trip home with the three girls on her own; another harrowing story. (Ask Jessica for the story)





Elder Tuimauga is truly one of the Lord's most sincere servants. It was a privilege and a blessing to accompany him to New Zealand. He hasn't been a member of the church for long, but the goodness simply oozed from him. He is still in New Zealand recovering from shoulder reconstruction.

We saw some of the country, which was incredible. It is winter there and it was freezing(!), which was a nice change from the heat and the humidity. We spent some time on a mountain luge track. It was a great mix of serving and having some fun with our dear friends!

On This Mother's Day

It is an interesting experience spending every holiday away from family. As each one passes, I think about how grateful I am for each of you; for the memories of past times together; for your efforts to be good and do good. Each of you (my children, spouses and grandchildren) brings into my life something unique. I appreciate the richness of our lives together. My thoughts this Mother's Day are not sad thoughts; rather they are reflective. I count it a great privilege to be your mother, mother-in-law and Gammy. I recognize what an incredible blessing it is to share this earthly experience with each of you.

I have one favor in my absence: would each of you parents gather your children close; hug and kiss and hold them for me; whisper to them 'Gammy loves you.' Help them understand how deeply I feel that love. Promise them in the future we will share wonderful, new adventures! Remind them of their Heavenly Father's love and make them feel safe and protected.

Thank you for all that you do for me; we feel your prayers and your thoughts. This experience has been enriched by your individual efforts.

I love each of you; more and more every day.
Mom/Deb/Gammy

Just Some Thoughts

I have been feeling like we need to write about some of the serious things that happen on a mission. Much of it is too personal to share here, but some of it I can.

We spend much of our day talking with students about all kinds of things. Many of them struggle with great difficulties. We have listened to heartbreaking stories about abuse and neglect, feeling trapped and controlled, being persecuted by family members for their belief in the gospel, struggling against great odds to be good and do good. So much of the time I feel completely inadequate to help. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed and guilty that my life is so incredibly blessed. Teaching, knowing the struggles, has become an emotional challenge. Most of the time when I teach and testify of the Savior I have difficulty holding back the tears. I look at their faces and see their aching hearts and desperately want for them to feel the Savior's love for them.

I have felt the hand of the Lord in my preparation and teaching. I hang on to the hope that somehow my students will see God in their lives, will fully commit themselves to Him and be filled with His love. Their futures scare me, worry me and leave me wondering. There are things I can't explain to them; things that if they believed would matter so very much. What is absolutely amazing is through all the pain and struggle they find happiness in everyday life; what a lesson it has been for me.

How grateful I am for what I know and what I feel. I find great peace in knowing He has promised to care for 'even the least of these.' I have come to know without question that when we stand to be judged the most important question will be 'how have you loved?' I worry about answering that question. I worry my capacity to love is greater than I recognize. I worry I might have only loved those who are easy to love. I worry I might have neglected to find the ones who really need love because they frighten me. I worry my love has not been pure. I guess all any of us can do is to see His love and allow Him to perfect our own.

Thanks for listening; I love each of you beyond expression. MOM

Gramps and Dixie's Visit

We had a mid-semester break from Institute so Gramps and Dixie came for a visit. We had a wonderful time. We were very busy and saw too many things to post. We started the week by going to Sauniatu. It is a small village in the tops of the mountains where the saints gathered when they were being persecuted. When the Prophet David O. McKay visited, he prophesied that someday the country of Samoa would be covered with stakes and there would be a temple here. The village includes a school, a church building and housing for employees and senior missionaries. It is a breathtaking spot.

This is the waterfall and swimming area.

Gramps and Grandma Dixie above the waterfall.

Sua Trench is a beautiful spot on the backside of the island. This is a swimming hole that is filled with ocean water entering into it through an underwater cave. It is about a 40 foot climb down a ladder to the water.

On the way down to the swimming hole.

Papa climbing down the ladder. It looked scary to me!

The coast line at Sua Trench--a photographer's paradise! We may never get Matt out of here when they come to visit.

On the way home this day we stopped at a ward party at this beach, Lalomanu.

One day we went out to a resort on the west end of the island for dinner and to see the sunset. The tide was out and on the way we saw these pigs out in the ocean sand digging for and eating clams. It was very entertaining!


Gramps and Dixie at Le Vasa Resort.

We lucked out because there was a wedding at the resort that night, so we got to watch a Samoan show while we were there. This man is blowing a conch shell calling all of the guests to the wedding. I was amazed at the sound that came out of the shell.

These tatoos are traditional in Samoa, tell a story, and are indicative of their village status. They run from the waist down past the knees.

Sunset at Le Vasa.

Always the favorite of a Samoan show--the fire dancer. When he was finished he came and shook our hands. His hands were very, very hot!

On Easter morning, between Conference sessions, Sister Haleck prepared breakfast for all of the senior couples. She made "heaps" (as they say here in Samoa) of food. It was delicious!

On Monday morning we went to see Robert Louis Stevenson's home. Unfortunately, it was closed because it was a holiday. When a holiday (like Easter) falls on a Sunday, the next day, Monday, is a day off of work for EVERYONE! We were very disappointed that we didn't get to see inside. Papa used his best Samoan to talk the security guard into letting us look in every window.

All week, Gramps kept watching the power lines wondering where the generating plant was. We finally found it! He said it was interesting because it was a "delta" system--all Greek to me, but he got a big kick out of it.

We stopped briefly at Papase'ea, or sliding rock, to watch the kids play in the water.

It is quite a walk down and back up to the water. We had to rest a few times (and it wasn't just Gramps and Dixie who needed the rest!)

This was our last night together. We went out to dinner at a place called Sails right on the water. It was beautiful. We were so sad to say goodbye, but so grateful that they made the big trip across the ocean to see us!

And it is back to work!

To Grace, Dax, Jenna, Gehrig, Lily, Owen, Claire and Avery - Can't wait for you to visit!

We thought you might enjoy some pictures of where you'll stay, things you'll see, and things you'll do when you come to visit. We can't wait. Here is our house.

Here is the bedroom you'll sleep in.

I'll teach you to play the ukulele, although I'm not very good at it myself. Check out the chair; Gammy made the covering for them.

Every time you send pictures or cards to us, we put them where we can see them.

This is Papa's taro patch; we also have another garden we can get food from when you get here. Have you ever eaten taro before?

We're hoping you'll go with us to shop at the market; we buy our fruit and vegetables there.

You can help us pay for the food with our Samoan money.

Fruit looks different here, but we think you'll like it.

We will take you for a drive around the island. We'll see some amazing things, like this waterfall. We'll find one a little smaller for you to swim in.

When we go for a drive, we'll see how Samoans live. Their houses are a little different than yours.

We will make sure and go to the beach. There are lots of different beaches we can go see. At the beach, we will swim, snorkel and collect sea shells.

We'll see lots of weird sea creatures, like this one.

There will be things for you to do when we are at our house also. This playground is right next to our house. We're sure you'll make some Samoan friends. Kids play on this playground every evening.

One of the things you'll enjoy is seeing all the animals that we see all over the island. We're hoping to see some baby pigs; they're very cute.


It rains almost every day here. This boy is going to school with his lavalava on. The kids wear uniforms to school; every school has a different uniform.

It's also very hot here. Wherever there is water, there's likely to be someone trying to cool off.

We'll see you soon in Samoa. Save up some hugs and kisses for us!